OK This is just to summarize what I found out the problem was, as I looked at this personally:
Amazon SES was set up fine! Nothing was wrong with how they set things up, and Dada Mail was sending through the service perfectly
Bugs were found:
The Sending Preferences Test had a bug in it, where if you were using Amazon SES, Dada Mail would still try testing the availability of the SMTP server set, by pinging it This makes no sense, as you're not using SMTP to send!
This particular message they were sending had some errors in their embedded Dada Mail template tags This problem wasn't reported in the interface, but was reported in the error log if you knew what to look for (like, moi) - it really should be reported in the interface
Once Bug #1 was ignored, and problem #2 was fixed, the message went out just fine
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